Jerk Stuff News

In spite of some recent criticism that Jerk Stuff is becoming Tera Patrick’s fan site, we have to assure you that this young lady is so easy and cute to write about. It is never boring to be near Tera as too many questions are opened around this mystic Asian beauty.

Due to the latest gossip on Tera Patrick divorce, the interest in booking Tera batrick has been rising to the astronomic heights!  Dozens of apprentice and professional movie directors  has been asking around how to book Tera Patrick and to subdue the whole hysteria the answer is pretty simple: “You can’t book Tera no matter what you do and how much money can you offer. ” She is not getting divorced and the pledge to shoot with her husband still works.

Sorry guys, more luck in next life. But if you have a thing for Tera, this is the closest you can get.

The hysteria over booking Tera Patrick can not be indulged but also booking Havana Ginger is not possible now. It’s because Havana Ginger music career.

A lot of rumors has been going on lately claiming Tera Patrick’s divorces… Is it because so many guys want Tera so bad trying to book Tera Patrick or is there a moment of truth in all those stories? In situation like this the least thing you want to do is listen to the gossip. So we phoned Tera again and asked her: “Tera, is there something ugly going on between you and Ewan?”
Tera started laughing and said – “No, not that I know of…” – and added: “People often see what they want to see! And too many people think they have seen Tera Patrick’s privacy just because they have seen Tera Patrick doing naughty no-no stuff. Well I have a message: that’s not Tera’s privacy because there is nothing personal in it, or at the end of the day – that is the least intimate part of Tera Patrick’s life. Besides, big stars plan their divorces carefully and I never thought of myself as big star. I’m just a regular pro though a little bit shy and that’s all to it!”
Right, guys – we are sure you feel uneasy about all this. Why not consider booking Havana Ginger instead? Havana is still unmarried and say,  too darn available!

Los Angeles CA, September 01, 2009.
(by Jerk Stuff reporter Shannon Reeves)

After great success of our news article on Tera Patrick Feet, another news from phone interview with Tera took us by surprise. This movie celebrity is working on her next movie release titled “As above so bellow” and the movie casting is on the way. Tera gave us a short phone call after yesterdays casting for the main male actor, and told us: “I’m so excited to see all those talented young actors and their interest to shoot with me. They all look at me like I’m goddess or something. But there are some extremely talented actors I’m afraid to work with, if you know what I mean… Though I’m completely prepared for this next movie, some guys make me shiver with their over-designed male counterparts.”

And then she added laughing: “Gezz, I fear for my life here!”

Having phone conversation with Tera Patrick is always amusing. But having Tera Patrick’s phone number… it’s such a powerful feeling!

Los Angeles CA, June 22, 2009.
(by Jerk Stuff reporter Shannon Reeves)

After successful and very profitable launch of the latest campaign for Saints Row 2, a movie star Tera Patrick spends a little fortune from campaign  hard earned money on her feet insurance. In case of accident and according to the insurance policy terms, Tera could get up to 6.3 millions!

As we found out from phone interview with Tera, her decision to insure her feet is not matter of prestige of any kind. It is both from her “inner feeling” and the fact that  with 500.000 monthly searches, Tera Parick Feet is single most searched term on the Internet when it comes to one persons particular part of body (while Angelina Jolie lips are on the second place with 280.000 searches per month). Further on, Tera Patrick foot fetish is the most wanted fetish attached to the name of single celebrity from Hollywood movie industry. So, it’s better to stay safe.

The author of this text really hope that the money Tera Patrick invested in feet insurance was in vain.

Love you Tera.

Belgrade, Serbia – June 20, 2009

(by Jerk Stuff reporter Dragan Radovic)

After catching flies in front of TV cameras the other day, Barak Obama has already prepared the next gag for us. He is going to play “one on one” basketball game against ex NBA ace Vlade Divac (LA Lakers and Sacramento).

This charity game will happen during Barak Obama’s official visit to Serbia in the autumn this year. The whole event has been scheduled during the recent US vice president Joe Biden’s visit to this Southeastern European state as symbolic gesture of Obama’s determination to finally improve relations with Serbia.

This 10 minute  exhibition basketball game will get broad media coverage with live broadcast on CNN.

Curiously enough, famous NBA player and good friend of Vlade Divac Kareem Abdul Jabbar will appear in the role of referee.

Paris, France – June 20, 2009

(by Jerk Stuff reporter Genevieve Giscand)

Madonnas confession reached us from Madonna’s hairdresser Klara Novitz from Paris. Klara is ex member of Madonna’s European crew and has a story to share.
The first guy Madonna slept with is certain Nathan West, a guy from Detroit, Michigan. Madonna and Nathan met in 1974 in “Mad Science” summer camp in Michigan and it was a love at the first sight. They were both 16. The last evening at the camp there was a party with camp fire, guitars and stuff, and Madonna remembers she singed like never. And then it simply happened… The details are not available, but obviously it was a thing to remember.
Sad thing is that they never met again. There was a couple of phone calls, a letter and that’s all to it. Madonna’s folks, conservative Italians would probably not have sympathies for their daughter’s relationship with black guy. So it all ended in bitter sweet memory like any other summer love does.
As Klara speculates, this event might have inspired Madonna to do some songs like “Papa Don’t Preach” and influenced some of Madonna’s videos like “Like a Prayer”.
Accidentally, Madonna has found out that Nathan West, her first real boyfriend, still lives in Detroit. He’s married with the kids and owns a fish store.

Hollywood, June 20, 2009.

(by Jerk Stuff reporter Guillermo Tergoletti)

Tailor Hackford, famous director of Devil’s Advocate has been recently uncovered for his engagement with US  Central Intelligence Agency.

Cooperation started in directors young days and until today this was the least known single detail in director’s biography. During his youth, aside from taking sewing classes, Taylor Hackford was well known in Los Angelass for hacking the codes for stolen car radios and his area of expertise were Ford car radios and audio equipment. Hackford never took part in thefts directly.

Due to the fact that Ford is the official vehicle of US secret service and the spooks could not help forgetting radio car codes, Hackford got the invitation he could not refuse. He became hacker for CIA Ford vehicles.

This engagenent gave him important contacts with Hollywood movie industry along with Al Pacino’s phone number.

Hansa Tonstudio, Berlin, June 18. 2009

(by Jerk Stuff reporter Dick Horne)

Previously known as aspiring adult movie star, Dominican Republic beauty Havana Ginger decided to make major detour in career switching to the music industry.

At the major surprise of us all who got used to see chocolate beauties in Hip Hop music genre, Havana has completely different plans. She intends to start off her career with Americana / Roots and majority of the songs will be played with acoustic instruments.

The title of the album has already been chosen for “Close, but not cigar”. This name is supposed to introduce this young lady to wide audience and especially to those who never got to know who Havana is.

But there’s more to it. The album producer, author and co-author of several songs will be Bruce Springsteen who intends to record duet song with Havana. The song title is “Ginger Honey” and the song has been  written and previously intended for Bruce’s duet with his wife and backing vocal Patti Scialfa, but was never recorded for unknown reason. Aside form Bruce, several songs will be contributed by legendary Willie Nelson.

It is still been speculated how come Havana Ginger managed to reach such tremendous and practically “overnight” jump start in music career. The answer is simple – it’s her manager Ewan Seinfeld. To remind you, Ewan Seinfeld is bass player for famous “Biohazard” and the husband of top movie star celebrity Tera Patrick who is shooting on location with Quentin Tarrantino at the moment.

The recording of the album “Close But not Cigar” has been scheduled for 29. of February next year, exactly two weeks after The Valentines Day when Havana will organize party for her “future ex colleagues” from movie industry. The first recording sessions will happen in legendary “Hansa Tonstudio” located in Berlin where Havana intends to move to start new life.

The only thing that is disputable  is Havana’s vocal qualities. In her previous professional career we used to hear her often, but with different tunes. If it’s to judge the book by the cover, it’s close… but not cigar.